Breaking News in the Riverland

I have bad news, but I also have good news.

The bad news is I had to cancel my session for this week. My players were largely busy, but hey, we're adults with real lives too.

The good news is that all the characters get another week of downtime, and the requests are already filtering in.

I also have even better news. Surprise! 

One of the awesome benefits of marrying 1:1 time to patron-level play is the game keeps running even if sessions get cancelled here and there. And, oh boy, are things running.

Here's the news from around the River Rhen- leaving out any secrets that might spoil the fog of war around our little Braunstein.

Several patrol to the north have spotted bands of orcs scouting out past the northern hills and even crossing the River Rhen into human lands.

Baron Terrance the Mad has decided to end the orcish threat to his north once and for all. He's called together his followers, raised his yeomanry, and forged a contract with the Band of the Boar (led by Vatyr the Strong, famed soldier of fortune). Even Se'Lune Fe'Foress signed on for a week's tenure. After taking half a week to muster the armies are ready to march.

The Orcs of the Vile Rune tribe have noted the human patrols and learned of Baron Terrance's call to arms. Seizing the initiative, they have prepared some defenses of their own...

Meanwhile, Ramsey au Jus, lord-protector of the Free City Justadt and supposed ally of Baron Terrance is taking his time to muster his own militia. Will he join in the conflict or will he just watch? Hard to say, as the lord likes to play his cards close to his chest.

The session may have cancelled, but the game must go on.

Session 02: Hungry like the wolf

Summary: First time running an old school game for a table of six players, so I had to weave together something coherent through the chaos. Fortunately, I have good players- including the two newcomers to the table who had no OSR experience to speak of prior to tonight. Together they returned to the Marble Halls featured in Session 1, barely escaped becoming lunch to a pack of wolves, and learned what horror comes out of applied Newtonian physics. They also achieved two important milestones: finding the first treasure of the game, and giving Mikk Rasaft the Magic-User his first opportunity to learn new spells.

Time Record: This session began on the 14th Day of the 4th Month (July 4 in our world's calendar) and ended on the 17th Day of the 4th Month (July 7). Seeing as our next session will take place on July 11, aka, the 21st Day of the 4th Month, the players will benefit from four days of downtime.

 

Characters:

Se'Lune Fe'Foress - 1st level Half-Elf Fighter - Loves exploring, but seems to be less keen on fighting. Aiming for Bard college.

Mikk Rasaft - 1st level Magic User - One part student of the arcane arts, one part walking, talking Sleep clinic.

Ciarra O'Faolain - 1st level Cleric - Death goddess acolyte who's Neutral Good on her sheets, but trending towards Evil on the streets.

Remington Ross - 1st level Assassin -  Master of farm animal-based killing arts. Has yet to complete a contract for the guild (he's working on it, though).

Two new player characters also joined the table this session. They were:

Hieronymus "Hiero" Protagonist - 1st level Dwarf Thief - Imagine Robin Hood, except he's a hairy manlet with a vast collection of sharp objects.

Crystal- 1st level Druid - "A witchy, lesbian forest woman" with a "can-do attitude" who worships blood-thirsty forest spirits.

Session Report:

7th Day of the 4th Month: This session begins exactly where the last one left off. The original party returns to Rhenar after their disappointing expedition. Tired, goatless, and discouraged, a fight nearly breaks out between Remington and Se'Lune. Mikk ignores the others to go off bug-catching (gotta get those crickets for casting Sleep somehow). Ciarra decides to catch up on the rumours buzzing around town: orcs have been spotted to the north, a festival has started in the Free City of Justadt, and a herald arrived in town only days before in search of adventurers willing to work for his liege lord.

This last bit of news catches the cleric's attention and she goes to investigate further. The herald explains
that his master, Baron Terrance (commonly known as 'the Mad') calls for anyone brave enough to venture to a tomb recently discovered in his lands. He then hands Ciarra a flyer reading as follows:

"URGENT: Adventurers needed to clear out the undead haunting ruins in the northwest. Might be orc related. Slay any warlockes, shamans, necromancers, &c. to aid the juste & noble cause of orc annihilation. Any treasures found are faire game, except for enchanted weapons/gems. They are need for the milita. [sic]"

Ciarra takes this information back to her compatriots, prompting the party to decide how to proceed with this week's adventure. Meeting back at the Red Cock public house, they are also joined by two new individuals who easily sell their value to the original four. The six commiserate for a while, and then almost unanimously agree to return to the Marble Halls for a second delve. Only Ciarra dissents- eventually agreeing to go along with the rest of the party so long as they agree to follow up with Baron Terrance the Mad next time. The other five assent to these terms.

Although the players are ready to set off on their next adventure, I remind them how four of the characters literally just returned from a week-long journey into the wilderness and require some much needed bedrest. They decide to spend the rest of the day in town. Some of the characters purchase extra provisions for the road. Remington decides his goat-herding days are behind him, and instead spend the rest of his coin on several chickens he buys from a local farmer.

Se'Lune finds Captain Jacob Pigeon in the usual spot, and attempts to hire him. While a drunkard he may be, Cap't Jake is still a mercenary captain and a 5th level one at that. According to the DMG, the base price to hire his services for a month is 500 g.p. Day rates are out of the question, and the Fighter just doesn't have the coin. Still, Se'Lune and Ciarra attempt to offset this cost by offering to pay off his bar tab, pretending to cure his hangover with magic, and other odd favours. I let the dice decide, and the dice decide discretion is the better part of valour for the captain. He roundly refuses their offer, preferring debtors jail to near certain death in subterranean ruins. 

Ciarra decides this insult will not stand. She get her hands on some raw poultry, dunking it into a mug of ale before offering it to Cap't Jake in an attempt to give him food poisoning. He falls for the trick (and Ciarra falls ever closer to an Evil alignment).

Night falls, and the six get some sleep.

8th Day of the 4th Month: The party sets off as soon as the sun rises. The day is mostly uneventful as the adventurers follow the River Rhen towards their destination. There's a brief episode when they encounter a pack of four strange, yellowish-brown dogs in a meadow clearing. 60 yards away, the party prepares for danger. Remington climbs up a tree to get a better vantage point. Ciarra arms herself and begins slamming her mace against her shield as a warning to the canid creatures. Crystal just hopes they're friendly. 

What the players don't know is the result of my reaction roll indicates these creatures have a friendly, albeit skittish disposition. The cleric's banging only succeeds in scaring off the dogs, who sudden disappear with a series of Blink-blink-blink. The travelers cautiously hold their ground for two minutes (two rounds) before deciding the threat has passed. Those poor blink dogs just wanted to be friends! 

Moving on, the party eventually makes camp for the night, which passes uneventfully.

9th Day of the 4th Month: The good news is the party doesn't get lost this time and arrives in the ruins hex by noon of the second day. The bad news is they stumble into the territory of a pack of 10 hungry wolves. 

Since neither side is surprised, I roll the encounter distance at 120 yards. I also roll for the 75% chance for the wolves to be hungry- and they are. Se'Lune, Crystal and Ciarra form a defensive half-moon formation, while Mikk helps Remington with a desperate plan to slather the ground behind the party with lard. I never asked what his player's plan was, although I assume it had something to do with lighting the lard on fire. Hiero preemptively winds up with two of his throwing daggers. 

On their end of the first round, the wolf pack splits in two: a larger group dashes for the front line, while a smaller portion circles around for the weak, squishy rear. 

Combat would have been met, had not Crystal intervened with a timely use of a Speak with Animals spell (and a lucky roll for segment on the wolves side). Sadly I didn't get my chance to try out the Overbearing attack procedure...next time, maybe. I digress. 

The druid suddenly yells out, "Don't attack us, we have food for you." 

This gives the wolf pack some pause, and they slow their charge into a prancing prowl. 

"You're all so plump and edible," retorts the pack's alpha. "What could you possibly offer us that's better?"

Crystal offers them Ciarra's uncooked chicken leg (yes, the same one she poisoned Jake Pigeon with). The wolves respond with a demand for something fresher. The druid offers them Remington's chickens (yes, he brought them with him, the mad lad). Remington takes offense to this, but it mute point because the wolves firmly request something more filling. They try to offer a compromise, suggesting the party lets them have Mikk's draft horse.

"Horses have strong blood, strong meat, good for pups, yes," says the alpha while licking his chops. 

I time this conversation, since Crystal's Speak with Animals only lasts three rounds (i.e. three minutes). Luckily the two parties reach a deal before the spell dissipates. The adventurers offer some of Remington's chickens as well as anything edible they find in the dungeon. In return the wolves let the party keep their lives...but retain the right to eat Mikk's horse if they get too hungry waiting outside of the dungeon entrance. 

And so the six characters make their way to the entrance into the Marble Halls, escorted closely by hungry, suspicious wolves.

As per their agreement, the pack waits outside while the party lights up their torches and lanterns before delving back into the darkness. Exploration goes much smoother this time, as it turns out not having to chase down a scared goat through dark tunnels makes for better decision making. Whodda thunk?

Hiero volunteers to scout ahead, letting his dwarven infravision adjust to the darkness. He also attempts to keep an eye out for traps, although his ability to see in the dark is not nearly high enough definition. Sneaking southwards, he encounters no trouble. 

Satisfied that the way is clear, the dwarf taps the marble walls with a rock to signal the rest of the party to come to him. They are at a bit of a cross roads with several side passages they could decide to go down. In the end, they decide to visit a short hallway of doors they mapped in the first session. This passage is only 50' long, ends with a door, and has two symmetrical pairs of doors on both the left and right.

Naturally, they first head for the doorway at the end of the hall. Hiero quickly informs the party that he will check the door for traps, and Se'Lune helps him with her half-elven eyes. They find nothing unusual. It then takes two turns of slamming against the door to finally burst it open- luckily no wandering monsters hear the commotion. Torchlight reveals a medium-sized room with plenty of large puddles and clusters of small stalactites clinging to a dripping ceiling. Remington is the first to shove his way through the door. 

He throws a chicken from a cage on his back into the room, waiting to see if any trap goes off. Nothing happens, and he slowly steps into the room himself to investigate the puddles on the floor. Se'Lune and Ciarra cautiously follow behind while the rest of the party remains in the hallway, watching for monsters. 

Remington smells the water...it has a definite mineral-ly smell. Suddenly, one of the large stalactites drops from the ceiling onto Remington's chicken (I decided on a random roll to see who it fell on, the players were lucky it was just the bird and not them at first, as they know I'm not the type to ever pull punches). The farm bird explodes in a spray of gore as the rock spike impales it. Suddenly a mulloscoid shape
extends from the top of the stalactite and begins feeding on the meat and feathers. 

Suddenly two more of the creatures fall from the ceiling, this time aimed at Ciarra and Remington. Remington rolls out of the way, narrowly avoiding a surprise trepaning procedure, but Ciarra is not so lucky. She barely raises her wooden shield in time to stop the piercer. It punches through, impaling part of her arm and causing the first HP loss of the game (I'm actually proud of how cautious my players are, but nothing ventured nothing gained). 

After that surprise round, the players win initiative. Ciarra drops her shield and begins pounding the creature's stony shell with her hammer- to no avail. Likewise, Remington fails to hit anything soft with his spear. Se'Lune decides to quickly scan the room before running. The delay pays off and she spots a small iron chest in the corner of the room. Risking (and dodging) an attack of opportunity, she runs to snatch the chest.

At this point, enough segments have passed for Mikk to brandish his cricket and cast sleep. The spell successfully puts all three piercers to sleep. The party takes the opportunity to dispatch each one before the spell wears off. 

After that near fatal encounter, Ciarra heals herself with magic while the party decides to take the piercer carcasses out to the wolves to honour their end of the bargain. Se'lune volunteers to wait with Ciarra in the dungeon. After the others drag off the ceiling calamari, the half-elf eagerly opens up the iron chest she snatched, finding 100 ancient platinum coins and a wax-sealed scroll inside. Ciarra suggests splitting the treasure two ways and hiding it from the other four, but Se'Lune quickly rebuffs her. 

Eventually the rest of the party returns without incident in the passing turns, and Se'Lune hands Mikk the scroll, who is delighted to discover it's covered in magical writing. A spell scroll! Unfortunately, he didn't prepare Read Magic, so the new magic would have to wait.

The party then splits up to try and open each of the other four doors in the hallway, leaving only Hiero and Remington to guard them. It takes a full half hour worth of turns before any of them successfully open a door. When it does finally happen, two doors open up. Se'Lune's door opens up to a seemingly open room, meanwhile Ciarra's opens up to the den of three dog-sized boring beetles. In a stroke of bad luck, the reaction dice indicates these oversized insects are hungry...and Ciarra's shield is a tasty chunk of wood.

Neither side is surprised, and the players go first. Ciarra casts her last spell of the day, a wisely prepared Sanctuary spell, which forms a nice bubble of holy energy to plug up the doorway as a bottleneck. Mikk comes up behind her, and gingerly taps one of the beetles with his quarterstaff. Hiero has the brilliant idea of flinging a pair of daggers at the beetles. Although he tries his best to mitigate any chance of hitting Ciarra from behind, he still manages to tag her in the shoulder. Somehow she survives this. The other dagger goes flying.

Meanwhile Se'Lune spends a minute calmly looking into her room, ignoring the struggle just 20' away.

Ciarra's sanctuary holds the beetles back on their turn, and then the party wins initiative again the next round. They land some blows against the insects, but nothing palpable. Crystal casts entangle, immobilizing all but one of the beetles by calling roots forth from beneath the floor. Taking the opportunity to get his comrades to safety, Hiero yanks Ciarra away from the doorway slams the door shut. Se'Lune then walks over to drive one of her signature iron spikes into the door as a makeshift bolt. 

Deciding to cut their losses while the going's good, the party exits the dungeon unmolested by wandering monsters. Outside they find the wolves happily chewing away at the piercers. Mikk is thrilled to see they did not eat his horse after all. 

With that, the party regroups and heads back to town.

10th Day of the 4th Month: The six arrive back at Rhenar safely close to sunset. Mikk takes the opportunity to Read Magic and determines his scroll contains a whopping total of six magic-user spells. However, he can only make use of two of them at his current level.

 

Chicken Count: 6-1 =5

Treasure & Experience Earned: 

The party found 100 pp and slew three piercers.

Ciarra -16 pp and 92 x.p.

Crystal - 16 pp and 92 x.p.

Hiero - 20 pp (he pockets the remainder like a true thief) and 101 x.p.

Mikk - 16 pp and a nice fat total of 1,641 x.p. thanks to the spell scroll.

Remington - 16 pp and 92 x.p. 

Se'Lune - 16 pp and 101 x.p.

Character Performance Ratings:

Ciarra - P - She would have gotten higher, had she not done several things very out of line with her role and alignment. Poisoning a poor drunkard? Suggesting stealing treasure from the rest of her comrades? Not very Neutral Good of her, and definitely not behaviour befitting a woman of the cloth. Still, I have to give her kudos for holding back a bunch of beetles on her own using her divinely invested power.

Crystal - E - This was her player's first time play any sort of rpg, let alone AD&D. I was thoroughly impressed. Her use of Speak with Animals saved the party from a sure mauling and set the tone for the adventure as she negotiated with the wolves in a way only a druid could pull off. Her entangle spell likewise came to the rescue later on. 

Hiero - E - Another first timer to AD&D. He played to his role very well, leaning on his racial talents to scout ahead and never failing to inform me when and how he searched for traps. He also even got a backstab! On his own comrade! By accident! He also informed me that he would spend the extra platinum he pocketed on Rhenar's local orphanage during downtime, what a softie.

Mikk - E - Once again, our intrepid evil prestidigitator saved his friends' hides with a well-timed sleep spell. He also was careful to track (and take opportunity to gather) miscellaneous spell components. AD&D incentivizes Magic-Users to be eccentric pack-rats and Mikk did not fail to live up to that.

Remington - S - At first I was worried that he was back on his bullshit when he bought those chickens, but I was pleasantly surprised to see how he used them. He also inquired after how to make poison. Unfortunately, he still hasn't completed any contracts or gone for any backstabs. I did like where he was going with the lard trap through- calmly setting up a fiery deathtrap in the middle of a combat situation strikes me as something a well-disciplined contract killer would do. Too bad he didn't get a chance to trigger it.

Se'Lune - S - She was the first one to take up a defensive position when the wolves showed up, and she heroically risked her flesh to grab the treasure chest when she didn't have to. She also stood by her convictions when Ciarra suggested robbing the others of their fair share. Honestly, the only thing holding her back from an Excellent rating was when she decided to ignore the beetle fight to lackadaisically gaze into the room she opened up. Shouldn't a fighter be one of the first to run to her friends' aid in a fight?

Downtime Requests: As mentioned above, the party has four whole days of downtime. While I'm still waiting on a couple of requests, I do have a few already.

Mikk will be spending his time trying to learn the two first level spells on the scroll he recovered: Magic Missile and Control Normal Fires.

As I noted above, Hiero will by spending his extra loot to feed some orphans, and I'd say that's enough to get them some nice meals for the four days he's in town. Luv that dorf, simple as.

Remington has put the word out through the Assassin's Guild that he's available to perform some espionage while he's in town. We'll see if any Patron players offer him work.

I'm still waiting on downtime requests from the other three players.

Comments: This session was honestly exhausting for me, having to juggle with six players at once. However, by the end, I felt what must be like a proud parent. The players actually survived not one, not two, but three potentially deadly encounters and managed to find some good loot to boot. 

I also had a chance to introduce some plot hooks kindly generated by by patron players, who are already settling into a game of intrigue. I'm excited to see what will happen next!

Session O1: In Search of the Marble Halls

Note: Since I'm a dirty plagiarist and like taking shortcuts, I'm just going to steal the session report format utilized by the Holgard Campaign blog and others, and fiddle with it enough to at least pretend I'm being original. Good ideas deserve good praise, so check his and other BROSR campaigns out.

Summary: The campaign begins with four misfits buying a map from a drunkard and hoping it leads to treasure. All they find is rats.

Time Record: This sessions begins on Monday, June 27 (7th day of the 4th Month in game) to Monday, July 4 (14th day of the 4th Month). That's exactly seven days, so session 2 will begin with these characters returning to town with NO DOWNTIME this week. Sucks to suck.

 Characters: 

Se'Lune Fe'Foress- 1st level Fighter Half-Elf- Has big dreams of joining Bard College one day.

Mikk Rasaft- 1st level Magic-User- Fresh out of his apprenticeship and searching for new spells.

Ciarra O'Faolain- 1st level Cleric- In service to a raven goddess, quickly learning that folks don't cotton to pagans round these parts.

Remington Ross- 1st level Assassin- Contract killer by night, goat-herder by day.

Session Report: 

7th Day of the 4th Month: Our session begins in the Town of Rhenar, with the party drinking in a local public house, the Red Cock. They listen to local drunk, Captain Jacob Pigeon, recount the tale of how his band of daring mercenaries once found a subterranean labyrinth full of glittering prizes and monstrous dangers nearby the town. As the sole survivor, he offers to give them a map he drew to show the way to the maze in return for enough coin to pay his lodgings for a week. 

The party attempts to haggle to no avail until Magic-User Mikk suggests he and Cap't Jake go head to head in a drinking match. Mikk wins (barely passing his save vs. poison to hold his liquor) while the old mercenary collapses into delirious sleep. The characters pocket the map and but pay off the drunkard's tab (both Mikk and Remington are evil, so I secretly track their alignment nudging slightly toward neutral for this).

Armed with a map to potential treasure, the party decides to spend the rest of the day chasing after specific needs. 

Remington makes contact with his superiors in the Assassin's guild. He accepts a contract to assassinate a fighter who's run off in the direction Cap't Jake's map points to. He figures with any luck he'll kill two birds with one stone.

Ciarra goes to the local chapel to meet Rhenar's priest. A quick aside on religion in this game. The dominant faith worships the Creator, mediated through lesser gods known as the Divine Council- think of Tolkien's Valar. They're all in the Good range. Ciarra worships a Neutral deity, so naturally she's viewed as a pagan and thus with a healthy heap of distrust. All this is to explain how and why her meeting with the priest ends with him politely telling her to shove off if she's trying to proselytize. 

Mikk, noting how Cap't Jake's map indicates a local river flowing by the dungeon, seeks out some rivermen to ferry he and his friends where they need to go. After some negotiation, its apparent that the party is too damn broke. 

Se'Lune the Fighter comes to the same conclusion after trying to seek out some henchman by making the tavern circuit. Her efforts are for nought although her encumbrance is several coins lighter. She does, however, meet a group of five mercenary horsemen, and they'll be sticking around for a month (unless one of the Patron players decides to muster forces for a brewing conflict- more on that in a later post).

8th Day of the 4th Month: Light of coin and short of patience, the four adventurers set out for the dungeon following along the nearby river. Remington pulls along his herd of 13 goats. Mikk, being a weak nerd, has to load up his supplies on a draft horse since his poor strength means he can only carry his spellbook and a couple of torches if he doesn't want to be weighed down in any way. Fortunately, they encounter nothing unusual or dangerous even after they make camp for the night.

Early in the night Ciarra sneaks off to sacrifice a chicken she bought while in town. We agree this is a suitable application of the "the teachings of and prayers to his or her chosen deity," the DMG notes clerics require to prepare 1st and 2nd level spells. It's also good role playing on her player's part.

9th Day of the 4th Month: Turns out Se'Lune is a terrible navigator. The party gets lost, and spend the rest of the day back-tracking to search for familiar landmarks. Luckily for them, they avoid any encounters both during the day and during the night.

10th Day of the 4th Month: Back on track after the day before, the party continues to follow the map. By the end of the day they reach their destination and decide to make camp. No point delving into a dungeon after another exhausting day of travel. A pack of wolves wanders nearby around midnight, but neither they nor Remington (who was on watch at that hour) feel in the mood for a fight and they quickly slink off.

11th Day of the 4th Month: They made it to the dungeon- about time! The party plans their next move as they wait outside of a cracked, marble archway. Remington leaves 12 of his goats tied to a post outside of the dungeon entrance. Mikk likewise takes what supplies he needs from his horse- his weak, soft frame trembling from the added weight. Mikk lights of a torch, Remington and Ciarra light up their lanterns and the part carefully delves into the darkness- or they would have, if it wasn't for Remington. 

Remember how he tied up only 12 of his baker's dozen of goats? He thought it would be a smart decision to bring his 13th goat into the dungeon as a sort of 'canary in the coal mine'. It would have been smart, but goats spook easily in dark, marble mazes, and this goat in particular goes off running after failing a morale check. Half the party makes a split decision to chase after the goat, and the other two follow along begrudgingly. 

I role to randomize the route the goat takes, although the dice indicate a straight path through the main entrance hallway. After two turns of chasing after the goat, Se'Lune takes out her frustration on the creature's neck. She's a Neutral Good character so killing an innocent domesticated animal out of pure frustration will chart a dip towards Evil...not enough to shift to Neutral just yet, however.

The loud CLANG of the beheading sword swinging through to the floor does provoke an early wandering monster check. As fate would have it, I roll the magic 1. I describe the sound of mass chitters and squeaks as a swarm of 50 rats of unusual size pour from around the corridor. The PCs win initiative, and neither side gets surprised. 

Mikk casts Sleep, and his spell goes off at an earlier segment than the rats. His spell places the front rank of 15 rats to sleep, but its not enough to stop the furry tide. Ciarra and Se'Lune form a tight front rank, and the latter brandishes her torch in an attempt to fend the rodents off. However, in a moment of rare genius, Remington lifts up the corpse of his beloved goat and successfully throws it into the mass of rats (way to make lemonade outta lemons). This drives the swarm into a feeding frenzy and they devour the goat as well as their sleeping brethren (netting the party some xp since the sleep spell caused these kills).

Using this distraction, the PCs flee back the way they came. Instead of going all the way to exit the dungeon, they bust through a door on their right in hopes of putting barricade between them and the rats (as far as the party knew, the rats could have still been chasing them). It was a risky move, but it paid off. The room was empty and only had one other door, opposite the entrance. Se'Lune hammers some iron spikes into the door to basically "bolt" it in. Ciarra and Mikk search the room and Remington tries to hide in a corner (note that, as a 1st level assassin, his thief skills outside of backstabbing are all non-existent). 

Another three turns pass while the party searches the room. This prompts another wandering monster check, which comes up as a 1. Suddenly, the characters hear the sound of several grunts and THUDS from boots kicking at the door.

The party prepares for trouble, and I tell them how they heard guttural voices growling unintelligible obscenities at through the door. 

At least, they would have been unintelligible, until Mikk's player suddenly piped up.

"Wait a minute," he said. "I know orcish, can I understand these voices?"

Affirmative. 

And then both Remington and Se'Lune's players point out they, too, know orcish.

What follows was some of the best roleplaying I've seen in a while. This patrol of orcs was small, and had no leaders. I want to make this point, because the regular old orc grunts are low-intelligence. 

Leveraging the fact that the orcs cannot see through solid wood doors, Se'Lune, Mikk and Remington begin to pretend to orcs and answer back in perfect orcish. They trick the brutes into thinking that locking the door is "smart strat-e-jicks" and learn that patrol is searching for a humie who matches Remington's assassination target. The also manage to tease out of the orcs how they're in conflict with a group of gnomes somewhere on this level.

Se'Lune ends the conversation by telling the orcs about "hearing the sound of a bunch of goats down that-a way." 

The party waits a couple more turns in relative safety before removing the door spikes and leaving the dungeon. Much to Remington's chagrin, all that's left of his goatherd is some bloody stains and happy memories. A die roll determines that Mikk's horse survived the hungry orcs. Lucky him.

 12th to 14th Days of the 4th Month: At this point of the night we were running out of time for the session. I mostly glazed through their return trip to town, but I made sure to roll for encounters BTB. Nothing came up and so they arrive back in Rhenar shaken, but unhurt.

Goat Count: 0 (-13)

 Treasure & Experience: No treasure this time, but everyone did get some x.p. from the dead rats.

Ciarra - 36 x.p.

Mikk - 39 x.p.

Remington - 36 x.p.

Se'Lune -  39 x.p. (the goat was defenseless and couldn't put up a fight, thus it earned her no x.p.)

Character Performance Rating:

Ciarra - E - She overall did what a cleric needed to do, and spending g.p. on sacrificial chickens was a nice touch. Her spell choices were also well-thought out for any contingency the party needed, although she didn't have to.

Mikk - S - That Sleep spell saved the party a lot of headaches, and helped earned the only x.p. the party received this session. The only thing keeping him from an Excellent rating is the fact he voted with Remington to blindly follow the goat through the dungeon. Not very 16 Int of him.

Remington - P - Why the goats? Just why? Why chase one through a dungeon? You're a cold-blooded killer-for-hire not a goat nanny (if Remington's player is reading this blog, I want you to know I love you, man. But why'd you have to chase the goat?) Throwing the goat carcass to distract the rats was clever though.

Se'Lune - E - A lot of smart dungeoneering savvy here. Se'Lune had the wherewithal to bring iron spikes to use as door bolts. She also thought use her torch to fend off the rats, Indiana Jones-style. That would have provoked a morale check from the rats, I'd wager, but it was a moot point after the goat carcass trick.

Downtime Requests: No time for downtime. A week-long round trek means session 2 will start immediately after returning to town.

(However, my four Patron characters will be active, as you will see later on).

Comment: Could've gone better. Could've gone worse. I enjoyed the puns and memes that went flying around, and a few of them will end up seeing some screen time in this campaign, I feel. 

Overall, the players were a little disappointed to not find any treasure after all that time. Bear in mind, we also rolled up characters right before starting the game. Since two of our players had little to no experience playing any game bearing the name Dungeons & Dragons outside of 5e, it unsurprisingly took a a little over an hour and a half. We generally have 4 hours of game time, so you do the math. 

Good news is session 2 will jump right back into the action. At the time of writing, that's tomorrow. I'm excited to see how it unfolds! Session 2 update soon.

Remember: you really CAN WIN AT RPGs!

Enter a world of ABSOLUTE Adventure

I used to be like you: a young lad, enthralled by the promise of Old School Renaissance (OSR) gaming with a veritable buffet of retroclones laid out before him. Starting with Labyrinth Lord, I amassed a collection games and systems from the weird and vulgar to the staid and carbon-copied. 

I also slowly collected copies of the original AD&D books, thinking them only as conversation starters since my unfortunately smooth brain balked at the idea of parsing out all the arcane text. 

Round segments? High Gygaxian? Weapon speeds? Who needs all that? I'll stick to my nice and simple B/X knock offs, thank you very much. At least that's what I first thought. 

I eventually came across a series of tweets by Jon Mollison in which he began with simple, yet controversial premise: "You can win at RPGs!" 

Despite this going against everything I had every heard or read in this hobby, I was taken in by the powerful rhetoric and bodybuilder gifs. It also helps how much of a contrarian I already was at that point (and still am, really). I liked what he had to say, and pretty soon I was telling my friends how they too can win at RPGs. 

A couple months later, I was reading Jeffro Johnson's early foray into AD&D, and soon encountered another controversial idea: maybe even my tiny brain could grasp it. Maybe all the talk about its complexity and impossible rules were just talk. Maybe I too can run AD&D the way Gary Gygax intended it to be played. I quit Twitter for two years and mostly forgot about Elite Powergaming as it was then called- but I never quite got over that itch to run AD&D rules-as-written. Two years have passed, it is now 2022. Those Elite Powergamers have a new name, the #BROSR. There's a whole new- or, more accurately, newly rediscovered style of play.

Strict time records for meaningful campaign play. Faction play with patron characters. Chainmail. Memes. Total Player Autonomy. These are the ingredients to playing the crazy awesome games Arneson and Gygax were up to in the 70s- or so the #BROSR claims. 

Reading about all the games these folks are getting up has convinced me to give it a fair shake. This what this blog is about. A bunch of friends playing Advanced Dungeons & Dragons rules-as-written with all the best practices a collection of /fit/-posters on twitter discovered at their own tables. Seriously, it's all pretty damn cool, and I want to replicate that success myself. 

I want my players and I to WIN AT RPGS! 

Enough OSR theory, enough highfalutin' ludology. Time to play the damn game and reach ELITE LEVEL GAMING.

Next time, read to find out what happens when a magic-user, a cleric, an assassin and a fighter meet up in a bar and decide to go plunder gnomish artifacts.